March
20, 2014 – The Shining
I’ve
neither read nor seen Stephen King’s The Shining. But as I prepare for my
upcoming trip to Wyoming I’m becoming well acquainted with the story. I’m
hearing a lot of jokes about redrum, writing/writers, and creepy (wait, there’s
another kind?) possession by demon spirits. Fortunately (for any potential
victims), I will be on my own. For in two weeks I will take
what warm clothes and light-packing entertainment I can and head into
Northwestern Wyoming to caretake a remote and snowed-in property.
It’s
an introvert’s dream.
It’s
a writer’s perfect get-away.
No
other people. No TV distractions. Short spurts of internet access. No cell
service. I’ll be snow-machined into the property!
I’m
counting down the days.
There
are fourteen.
My
ace in the hole when I’m relating my adventure to people and I see their eyes
widen as they try to imagine being alone for themselves or are watching (in
their mind’s eyes) the endless ways I’ll die while on my own is to say, “But
don’t worry, it’s not a grizzly area.” Because that’s reassuring. Because I’ve
been told the grizzlies don’t frequent the area (or maybe it’s just that they’ll
be hibernating, or waking from hibernation?). It’s too high for bears. I’ve
been told. On another note, I’m hoping that if there are packs of wolves that
they’ll be werewolves and become my friends. Because that would be really cool.
Much less scary than a rabid pack of wolves that circles the lodge and keeps me
imprisoned until my canned food runs out and I burn up the last stick of chopped
wood for the fireplace. Either way it’ll make for a great story later. If I
survive. 
But
don’t worry, guys, I bought a book called How To Stay Alive in The Woods and I’m
almost finished reading it. Everything will be just fine.
My
The Shining days will last for just over two months. I don’t fear insanity. What
I really fear is that the days will fly by too quickly. Since I already talk to
myself, inanimate objects, animate objects, and etc… I can’t imagine that isolated
solitude can do anything worse to my already quirky personality. Right.
Maybe
I should pack a volleyball just in case.
…Nah, that can be my summer adventure.
